Recently, due to the increase of Facebook usage and the vocal statuses of people with 3-digit IQs, the lesser endowed people have now begun to catch on memes and fads. LET ME TAKE A LOOK AT THEM LIKE A JUDGEMENTAL DICKLE.

Thikassse Bhaaaaaaaa and Facebook Fanpages:

It all started with Thikassse Bhaaaaaaaaa (Note: The 3 S’s and the 9 As). Soon after those self-proclaimed hadomins made the fan page, I got a Facebook message from this mysterious profile. It was codeworded. Since it is now declassified, I can show it to you guys.

Code-words.

Translated:
“Bro, share4share?”

Ever since then, a whole score of new fanpages opened. People started posting statuses like the following

Don’t get me wrong over here, there are a few good fanpages which are ACTUALLY funny but take a look at this guy shitting bricks because Thikassse Bhaaaaaaaa probably told him that doing wheelies in front of Viqarunnissa will probably make him look like the biggest douche out there.

Close enough. By biggest, I mean his head.

And finally. Nobody gives a shit about LGBT rights in Bangladesh but once TB decides to with the caption “Hizra Alert”, everyone starts petitioning for LGBT rights. Take a look at this guy whom we can safely assume was never harassed by transsexuals or had his dong split into two by one.

Legit advice needed.

Let me get this straight, you are looking for advice from a Facebook fanpage which just uploaded a picture with the caption “Hizra Alert”.

And finally, this guy:

Taking Thikassse Bhaaaaaaaa so seriously, he decides to enroll my help and then label me as an admin of Thikassse Bhaaaaaaa when I refused to help him. I can hardly run Rantages let alone a fan page about what Rantages is supposed to be about.

The comments section welcomes your rage about me, Rantages and everything else that is wrong with your life.

Hipsters:

A lot of people are not self-proclaimed hipsters nowadays. Hating on anything that is trending. I am sorry to break it down to you, Sparkles, the Michael Jackson track you are now listening to is awfully trendy and it is more amazing than all of your opinions put together. There’s the difference between good trending and bad trending. Illustrated below.

As you can see above, Manchester United vs That club with a lot of money. That’s kind of self-explanatory. There’s also Adele trending like crazy vs Rebecca Black trending like crazy. There’s Adele with an amazing voice on the left hand side. While there’s Rebecca Black. 12-year-old girls want to be like Rebecca Black because she doesn’t break the BMI scale and ’cause Miss Black likes to sing songs about kicking things in the front seat. Finally, everything else vs Aweshumnesh’s Facebook profile. If you would like to avoid all the trends that have a detrimental effect on your IQ, I suggest you add him to see a real life demonstration.

Now what does a Hipster do? They will shun anything that is liked by the mass public regardless of its qualities. Not to mention the fact that they will put anything they do not like under the heading of  ”Sell-out” or “Mainstream”. For example, if you ask a male hipster why they do not engage in anal sex (receiving end), they will simply say that “Being gay is mainstream, bro”. Even though a large part of the gay community in Bangladesh hides ‘Underground’ and is a minority. It’s just mainstream. Too mainstream.

These hipsters will only listen to underground music. If you ask them whether they like Electronic music or not, they will simply take you to their basement, point at the electricity meter’s ticking noise and go

“Listen to this shit. This guy from BUET made this. He doesn’t know he’s a good DJ. Hell, he doesn’t even know he’s a DJ”.

Immunity: My dad's from BUET and he offered to play bass using that excuse.

Be Anti Charitable Organisation [Especially Jaago]

There are people out there who have not even done a day’s worth of charity work, who are criticising the charity work of others. These people are the same people who say “Maaf koro” to beggars, which they pronounce “Muff [www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=muff] crow” Click the link to know what muff means in case you don’t. Or just let me illustrate what Muff Crow means.

The Bengali Hypocrisy strikes again! People who do not take part in any charity events or do anything in their lives for charity are suddenly screaming against these organisations for stealing money. Let me tell you, if you guys are such self righteous bastards, then make your own organisation and please stop drinking that girly vodka piss. That money could go to poor people for their alcohol bills.

In case you are wondering, half of my staff is from Scholastica and I am not being threatened at gunpoint to write this by the chick wearing no pants and a Jaago t-shirt.